True confessions
Jun. 30th, 2009 07:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
It doesn't happen very often, but every once in a while I really really really want to be a drag queen. I have way, way too many glitter products that never get used. I have a container of clear, purplish fake nails that have black and grey and silver sparkly stars on them. I have multiple styles, colors, lengths of fake eyelashes. I do a mean winged eyeliner. My rack isn't impressive by fannish standards, but it's pretty. I want to be gaudy, gauche, bawdy, loud, sparkly, fabulous. At least for a few minutes.
Only, I really don't like for people to look at me. And I feel like it's wasteful to do these things just to be in my house, b/c the whole POINT of them is to be seen. You see the problem here.
Mood-altering drugs? Lots of alcohol? Getting the fuck over myself? I didn't used to dislike attention the way I do now; that attention-whore thing about my daughter that was on such blatant display last year at Dragon*con? Yeah, it's a little familiar.
Really, though? I just want to have these awesome, ridiculous plastic fingernails without feeling like a moron. Or at least like a fabulous moron.
Only, I really don't like for people to look at me. And I feel like it's wasteful to do these things just to be in my house, b/c the whole POINT of them is to be seen. You see the problem here.
Mood-altering drugs? Lots of alcohol? Getting the fuck over myself? I didn't used to dislike attention the way I do now; that attention-whore thing about my daughter that was on such blatant display last year at Dragon*con? Yeah, it's a little familiar.
Really, though? I just want to have these awesome, ridiculous plastic fingernails without feeling like a moron. Or at least like a fabulous moron.
no subject
on 2009-07-01 12:17 am (UTC)ETA: I'm so jealous -- I can't do winged eyeliner to save my life!
no subject
on 2009-07-01 01:36 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-07-01 03:17 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-07-01 04:10 am (UTC)Plus, no reason NOT to dress up a little in your own home. Some days I make myself cute even when I know I'm not leaving the house, just cos I feel like it. I like to experiment with new hairstyles at home and some of 'em I end up never bothering to wear out. I have a whole genre of cute lounge clothing that isn't pajamas per se but that's my "comfy yet cute inside the house" clothes. So why not wear glitter and fake nails?
ETA: Also, I reallly wish I could do eyeliner. I may need to have you teach me.
no subject
on 2009-07-01 02:37 pm (UTC)